Research Focus: This article examines the concept of “self confidence” as promoted in the personal development and coaching industries, traces its historical and philosophical origins, and analyzes its compatibility with the Islamic principle of Tawakkul (reliance on Allaah).
Introduction
Society has sold you a version of “confidence” that demands endless struggles, tears, and sacrifices, an elusive goal that often leaves you exhausted and hollow. You’ve pushed yourself, fallen, and risen again, all for what?
To conform to society’s blueprint.
But as a Muslim, you don’t need to chase society’s definition of confidence. We have something far more profound and more trustworthy: Tawakkul.
It’s your key to:
- Struggling less (we can still be tried even when we put our trust in الله)
- Living at peace more, إن شاء الله (in shaa Allaah)
Tawakkul isn’t about self reliance alone; it’s about trusting the One who never fails.
In this article, you’ll uncover:
- Where the concept of “self confidence” originated in the personal development space and who has been promoting it
- How self confidence is being marketed in Muslim spaces
- Why Tawakkul outshines self confidence from an Islamic perspective
- What you, as a Muslim, should truly focus on, backed by Qur’aan and authentic hadith
It’s time to break free from the chains of societal expectations.
Part 1: The Origins of “Self Confidence” as a Concept IN THE PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT INDUSTRY
Where Did “Self Confidence” Come From?
Before we can understand why self confidence contradicts Islamic principles, we need to understand where this concept originated and who has been promoting it.
The modern obsession with “self confidence” didn’t just appear out of nowhere. It has specific historical roots in Western philosophy and psychology that directly contradict our belief in Allaah as the source of all strength and success.
The Birth of Self Confidence: Early 1900s America
The concept of “self confidence” as we know it today emerged in early 20th century America during what’s called the “New Thought Movement.” This movement taught that:
- Your thoughts create your reality
- You have unlimited power within yourself
- Success comes from believing in yourself above all else
- You are the master of your own destiny
Key Figures Who Popularized Self-Confidence:
1. Napoleon Hill (1883-1970)
Author of “Think and Grow Rich” (1937), one of the most influential self help books ever written. Hill claimed that:
- “Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve”
- Success comes from “auto suggestion” (repeating affirmations to yourself)
- You must develop “faith in yourself” as the primary tool for success
Hill’s work was heavily influenced by New Thought philosophy, which has roots in transcendentalism and metaphysical beliefs that everything is connected through a universal mind or energy.
2. Dale Carnegie (1888-1955)
Author of “How to Win Friends and Influence People” (1936). Carnegie built an empire teaching people how to:
- Project confidence even when you don’t feel it
- Use psychology to influence others
- Present yourself in ways that make people like and trust you
His methods focused on outward performance and mastering social manipulation techniques.
3. Norman Vincent Peale (1898-1993)
Author of “The Power of Positive Thinking” (1952). Peale, a Christian minister, popularized the idea that:
- Positive thinking can change your circumstances
- You have inherent power within you to overcome anything
- Visualizing success makes it happen
His work mixed Christianity with New Thought metaphysics, creating what many Christian theologians criticized as heresy.
The Philosophical Foundations: Humanism
All of these teachings are rooted in humanism, a philosophical stance that emphasizes:
- Human beings as the measure of all things
- Reason and human capability over divine revelation
- Self reliance and individual autonomy
- Rejection of dependence on a higher power
Humanism teaches that humans are inherently good, capable, and self sufficient. This directly contradicts the Islamic teaching that humans are inherently weak and completely dependent on Allaah.
How Psychology Reinforced Self-Confidence
In the mid 20th century, psychology began to formalize “self confidence” as a therapeutic goal:
Humanistic Psychology (1950s-1960s)
- Carl Rogers and Abraham Maslow promoted “self actualization”
- Therapy focused on helping people “find themselves” and “believe in themselves”
- The goal was to build self esteem and self confidence independent of external validation
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (1960s-present)
- Aaron Beck and Albert Ellis taught that changing your thoughts changes your reality
- “Positive self talk” and affirmations became therapeutic tools
- Building self confidence became a treatment for anxiety and depression
The Self Esteem Movement (1980s-1990s)
- Schools and parents were told to constantly praise children to build self esteem
- “Believe in yourself” became the mantra
- Society began to view self confidence as essential for success in life
The Modern Personal Development Industry
By the 2000s, the personal development industry exploded, turning self confidence into a multi-billion dollar product.
Key players today include:
- Tony Robbins: Teaches “unleashing the power within” through NLP and self belief
- Brené Brown: Promotes “self compassion” and “owning your story”
- Mel Robbins: “The 5 Second Rule” for building confidence through action
- Rachel Hollis: “Girl, Wash Your Face” teaching women to believe in themselves above all
- Jen Sincero: “You Are a Badass” promoting manifestation and self confidence
All of these teachings share common elements:
- You are enough as you are
- The power to change your life is within you
- Believe in yourself first, before anything else
- Your thoughts create your reality
- You don’t need anyone or anything outside yourself to succeed
Part 2: How Self-Confidence is Marketed in Muslim Spaces
The “Islamification” of Self Confidence
Now that we understand where self confidence comes from, we need to examine how it’s being repackaged and sold to Muslims as if it’s compatible with our deen.
The Problem: Same Methods, Islamic Terminology
Many Muslim coaches and personal development experts have taken secular self confidence programs and simply added:
- Qur’aan verses at the beginning
- “Bismillah” before exercises
- References to Allaah in their marketing
- Hijab in their branding
But the actual methods, frameworks, and philosophies remain the same.
Common Practices Being Taught to Muslims
1. Affirmations (Often Called “Islamic Affirmations”)
What they teach: “Say these statements to yourself daily:
- I am confident
- I am worthy
- I am enough
- I can do anything I set my mind to”
Some Muslim coaches frame these as “Islamic” by adding:
- “I am blessed by Allaah”
- “Allaah has made me capable”
The problem: Affirmations originated from New Thought metaphysics, which teaches that repeating statements to yourself changes reality through the power of your mind. This is a form of magic (sihr), as it attributes power to words spoken by humans rather than acknowledging that only Allaah has the power to change circumstances.
Even when Allaah is mentioned, the structure remains the same: you are speaking these things into existence through your own power.
The Islamic alternative: Du’a to Allaah, asking Him to grant you what you need, acknowledging that He alone has the power to give or withhold.
2. Visualization and Manifestation
What they teach: “Visualize yourself achieving your goals in vivid detail. See yourself succeeding. Feel the emotions of success. The universe will bring it to you.”
Muslim coaches often reframe this as: “Visualize your success, then trust Allaah to make it happen” “Make du’a while visualizing what you want”
The problem: This is the Law of Attraction with Islamic language added. The Law of Attraction teaches that you attract what you focus on through vibrational energy and universal laws. This is shirk, as it attributes power to something other than Allaah.
The belief that visualizing something helps bring it into existence is not from Islaam. It comes from New Age spirituality and has roots in Hindu and Buddhist meditation practices.
The Islamic alternative: Make du’a to Allaah for what you want, plan and take action, and leave the results to Him. You don’t need to “visualize” or “manifest.” You need to ask the One who controls all outcomes.
3. “Mindset Work” Programs
What they teach: Multi week programs focused on:
- Identifying limiting beliefs
- Rewriting your story
- Rewiring your subconscious mind
- Becoming your “highest self”
- Stepping into your power
The problem: These programs are built on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and neuro linguistic programming (NLP), mixed with New Age concepts like “energy” and “vibrations.”
CBT used in these programs:
- Places the self at the center instead of Allaah
- Teaches that you have the power to “rewire” yourself independently
- Focuses on self belief rather than reliance on Allaah
- Uses visualization and affirmation techniques that border on or cross into shirk
Many Muslim coaches are certified in these secular programs (ICF, NLP, life coach certifications) and then market them to Muslims without investigating the philosophical foundations of what they’re teaching.
4. Confidence Coaching Specifically for Muslimahs
There is a growing industry of “Muslim confidence coaches” who promise to help sisters:
- “Own their power”
- “Step into their confidence”
- “Believe in themselves”
- “Show up authentically”
What they often teach:
- Mirror work (staring at yourself and saying affirmations)
- Journaling exercises focused on “self discovery”
- Tapping/EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to “release blocks”
- Inner child work
- Shadow work
- Somatic practices
- Embodiment exercises
The problem: Most of these techniques come from:
- New Age spirituality
- Eastern mysticism (Buddhism, Hinduism)
- Western psychology divorced from Islamic framework
- Occult practices repackaged as “healing”
They are being taught to Muslim women without any investigation into their origins or compatibility with Tawheed.
Real Examples
Example 1: Muslim Life Coach Program
A popular Muslimah life coach offers a program that includes:
- “Breakthrough sessions” using NLP techniques
- CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) methodologies
- IFS (Internal Family Systems) work
- Building confidence in oneself as a primary goal
- NLP Master Practitioner level techniques integrated throughout
In her marketing, she emphasizes her Islamic identity and combines her medical background with Islamic studies knowledge, but the actual curriculum relies heavily on NLP, CBT, and other secular psychological frameworks that weren’t developed or vetted through Islamic scholarship.
Price: Individual consultation sessions (specific pricing not publicly disclosed, typically competitive with industry standards)
Example 2: Muslim Women’s Empowerment Coach
A high-profile coaching program for Muslim women teaches:
- “The Unique Method” – combining Western teachings with Islamic principles
- Energy healing techniques learned from building a global spiritual and energy healing telesummit
- The “##### Mental Diet” – monitoring thoughts and replacing negative self-talk with empowering affirmations
- Positive affirmations using sticky notes to “rewire mindset”
- Law of Attraction as a transformative tool
- Soul Healing sessions
- Programs focused on achieving “clarity, purpose, courage, confidence, connection, dignity, self-love, justice, abundance, leadership, freedom and faith”
The coach markets it as “faith based” and includes Islamic language, but the practices are straight from New Age spirituality.
Price: High-ticket premium coaching programs requiring discovery call consultation (typically $5,000-$50,000+ following industry standards for transformational coaching)
Example 3: Confidence Building for Muslimah Entrepreneurs
A business coach for Muslim women teaches:
- “Mindset mastery” through reprogramming your subconscious
- Visualization techniques for business success
- “Embodiment practices” to feel confident
- “Claiming your worth” through affirmations
She positions herself as a practicing Muslim and wears hijab in all her branding, but the methods are secular with Islamic vocabulary overlaid.
Price: 12-week course (specific pricing not publicly disclosed, follows industry standards for multi-week transformation programs)
*Note: Specific program names have been withheld to focus on
patterns rather than individuals. These examples represent
composite descriptions based on research of multiple programs
in the Muslim coaching industry.*
Why This is Dangerous
1. It Undermines Tawheed
When we teach Muslims that confidence comes from believing in themselves, we are teaching them to rely on themselves instead of Allaah. This is a subtle form of shirk.
2. It Normalizes Haraam Practices
By adding “Bismillah” to practices rooted in magic, occultism, and shirk, we make haraam seem halal. This is extremely dangerous for people’s aqeedah.
3. It Exploits Sincere Muslims
Sisters who genuinely want to improve themselves, grow their businesses, and serve the ummah are being sold expensive programs that contradict their deen. They don’t realize what they’re learning is problematic because it’s marketed as “Islamic.”
4. It Creates Dependency on the Self
Instead of turning to Allaah in times of difficulty, sisters are taught to “do the inner work,” “shift their mindset,” and “believe in themselves.” When they struggle, they blame themselves for not being confident enough rather than turning to Allaah with humility and du’a.
Part 3: What is Tawakkul
Defining Tawakkul: تَوَكُّل
The term Tawakkul comes from the Arabic root letters (و, ك, ل), meaning “reliance” or “entrusting someone to take care of a matter.”
Tawakkul is trusting الله سبحانه وتعالى (Allaah, subhaanahu wa t’ala) while doing what is necessary. But before diving into what Tawakkul is, let’s first clarify what it is not.
What Tawakkul Is Not
It’s not jumping into a pool without any practice and expecting Allaah to save you.
It’s not playing with fire, assuming الله سبحانه وتعالى will shield you from harm.
Do you see the problem here? Tawakkul doesn’t mean neglecting your responsibilities or skipping the effort required.
It’s not blind faith with no preparation on your part.
What Tawakkul Truly Means
To understand Tawakkul, let’s look at this story:
The Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم once noticed a Bedouin man leaving his camel untied. The Prophet asked him, “Why don’t you tie down your camel?” The man replied, “I put my trust in الله.” The Prophet then advised, “Tie your camel first, and then put your trust in الله.”
Source: Sunan At Tirmidhi, Book 25, Hadith 58 (Hadith 2517)
Grading: Hasan (Good) according to Tirmidhi; Da’if (Weak) according to Al-Albani
Note: While the grading is disputed, the meaning is supported by other authentic texts about taking means while relying on Allaah.
This hadith shows us:
- Take action: Do everything you can to help yourself (what is within your control)
- Submit to the will of الله سبحانه وتعالى: Trust الله سبحانه وتعالى to take care of what is beyond your control
This is the essence of Tawakkul: combining effort with trust.
It’s not just about faith in the plan of الله سبحانه وتعالى but also about doing your part to show you’re committed to the goal.
The Story of Prophet Moosaa (عليه السلام)
The story of Prophet Moosaa (عليه السلام) offers another powerful example.
When Pharaoh’s army pursued Moosaa (عليه السلام) and the Israelites to the edge of the Red Sea, what did الله سبحانه وتعالى command Moosaa (عليه السلام) to do before the sea split open?
Strike the ground with your staff.
Now, think about this. الله سبحانه وتعالى, who has the power to say kun fa yakun (Be, and it is), didn’t need Moosaa to strike the ground. Yet, He commanded it.
Why?
This action demonstrated effort and readiness on Moosaa’s part.
Qur’anic Reference: This story is found in Surah Ash-Shu’ara (26:63) and Surah Al-A’raf (7:160).
The Components of Tawakkul
Tawakkul demands reliance on الله سبحانه وتعالى. It requires:
Effort: Taking meaningful action toward your goal.
Trust: Leaving the results in the hands of الله سبحانه وتعالى with complete submission.
الله سبحانه وتعالى doesn’t expect you to succeed independently, but He wants to see you try. He wants to see you move, act, and prove your dedication to what you’ve prayed for.
So, the next time you ask for the help of الله سبحانه وتعالى, remember: Tie your camel, take the first step, and trust in the plan of الله سبحانه وتعالى, always.
Part 4: What is Self Confidence?
Self confidence is often defined as believing in your abilities, decisions, and worth. It’s trusting yourself to handle challenges and achieve goals without second guessing your value.
When you are preparing to give a presentation at school or work, self confidence is the belief that your preparation is enough, and you are capable of delivering your points effectively.
You might feel nervous, but you trust yourself to perform well despite those feelings.
In the personal development industry, self confidence is the ultimate product they sell.
Wrapped in therapies, programs, and motivational content, it promises the feeling of being in control: breaking through barriers to achieve your dreams and fulfill your dunya driven goals.
الله أكبر!
The Reality Behind Confidence
We live in a world that relentlessly conditions us to believe confidence is the key to success.
The media, schools, and workplaces constantly feed us the idea that confidence has a specific look, sound, and feel, and that without it, success is unattainable.
Sadly, many have bought into this narrative, adopting it as their way of life and even using these strategies to help others chase this fleeting ideal.
This version of confidence is self centered. It celebrates:
- Flaunting oneself
- Saying anything and everything, regardless of its impact
- Engaging in practices and behaviors that are often displeasing to الله سبحانه وتعالى
To the world, self confidence is the cure all. It promises:
- Those coveted 10k months
- The life of your dreams
- Perfect relationships
- Endless opportunities
Every program you invest in starts with one thing: mindset work, aimed at cultivating self confidence.
A Personal Testimony
Years ago, I joined 2 programs to help build my confidence. One was led by a non Muslim, and the other by a Muslimah.
While the latter mentioned الله سبحانه وتعالى, the methods used in both were shockingly similar, and dangerously flawed.
Both programs emphasized creating a space to vent, open up, and speak about the past to “release” trauma. But the techniques they offered, even under the guise of Islamic framing, revolved around trusting yourself above all else.
However, الله سبحانه وتعالى says:
وَخُلِقَ ٱلۡإِنسَٰنُ ضَعِيفًا
Translation: “And mankind was created weak.” (Surah An-Nisa, 4:28)
Tafsir Explanation (Ibn Kathir):
Ibn Kathir explains this verse by saying that human beings are weak in several ways:
- Weak in their resolve when faced with desires
- Weak in their ability to be patient
- Weak in their physical strength
- Weak in their knowledge
- Weak in their willpower
This weakness is inherent in human nature, which is why we must rely on Allaah, who is Al Qawiyy (The All Strong).
(Reference: Tafsir Ibn Kathir, Surah An Nisa, verse 28)
How can we fully trust ourselves when we are inherently weak?
Society relentlessly teaches us that success in any aspect of life begins with self confidence.
You might be thinking, “But haven’t we seen people achieve incredible worldly heights by trusting themselves?”
Yes, it seems that way.
But as Muslims, we understand that these people are being provided for by الله سبحانه وتعالى. Their belief that their success stems solely from their hard work and self confidence is rooted in 2 key factors:
Cultural Influence: The language and mindset ingrained in their culture perpetuate the idea that self reliance is the ultimate key to success.
They are ignorant of الله سبحانه وتعالى: Lack of knowledge about the Lordship of الله سبحانه وتعالى, as the Provider and Sustainer, which blinds them to the true source of their achievements.
Without this understanding, they attribute their worldly gains to their efforts alone, unaware of the One Who truly facilitates their success.
But you as a Muslim, know better, right?
Part 5: How Confidence and Tawakkul are Different
Tawakkul means relying on الله سبحانه وتعالى while actively preparing and putting in your best effort in areas within your control. For everything beyond your control, you trust الله سبحانه وتعالى to take care of the outcome.
In contrast, confidence means relying solely on yourself, your abilities, decisions, and approach, to complete a task and achieve results.
Let’s break it down further and understand this through a table:
| Tawakkul | Self Confidence |
|---|---|
| Relying on الله سبحانه وتعالى while putting in your best efforts for what is within your control and leaving the outcome to Him. | Trusting your abilities and approach to complete a task. |
| Reliance on الله سبحانه وتعالى, the Owner, Provider, and Creator of the worlds. | Reliance on yourself, despite الله سبحانه وتعالى describing mankind as inherently weak. |
| Work becomes easier, more peaceful, and filled with barakah (blessings), as الله سبحانه وتعالى, the Source of peace, is involved. | Work often becomes stressful and exhausting because it depends solely on limited human capabilities. |
| The blessings and mercy of الله سبحانه وتعالى are infinite; there’s no limit to what He can provide. Subhan الله! | Human abilities are finite; there’s a clear limit to what they can achieve. |
| Encouraged by Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم | Promoted by an ignorant society that lacks knowledge of الله سبحانه وتعالى and His provision. |
Part 6: Islamic Analysis – Why Self Reliance Contradicts Tawheed
The Qur’anic Evidence
1. Allaah Created Humans Weak
يُرِيدُ اللَّهُ أَن يُخَفِّفَ عَنكُمْ ۚ وَخُلِقَ الْإِنسَانُ ضَعِيفًا
Translation: “Allaah wants to lighten [your difficulties]; and mankind was created weak.” (Surah An-Nisa, 4:28)
Tafsir Explanation (Ibn Kathir):
Ibn Kathir explains this verse by saying that human beings are weak in several ways:
- Weak in their resolve when faced with desires
- Weak in their ability to be patient
- Weak in their physical strength
- Weak in their knowledge
- Weak in their willpower
This weakness is inherent in human nature, which is why we must rely on Allaah, who is Al Qawiyy (The All Strong).
(Reference: Tafsir Ibn Kathir, Surah An Nisa, verse 28)
2. Human Transgression Through Self Sufficiency
كَلَّا إِنَّ الْإِنسَانَ لَيَطْغَىٰ ﴿٦﴾ أَن رَّآهُ اسْتَغْنَىٰ ﴿٧﴾
Translation: “No! [But] indeed, man transgresses, because he sees himself self sufficient.” (Surah Al Alaq, 96:6-7)
Tafsir Explanation (Sa’di):
Imam Sa’di explains that when a person begins to believe they are self sufficient and no longer in need of Allaah, they transgress the bounds. This self sufficiency leads to arrogance, disobedience, and turning away from worship.
The verse is a warning that feeling independent from Allaah is the root of transgression and disbelief.
(Reference: Tafsir As Sa’di, Surah Al Alaq, verses 6-7)
3. The Contrast Between the Humble and the Arrogant
أَمَّا مَن أَعْطَىٰ وَٱتَّقَىٰ ﴿٥﴾ وَصَدَّقَ بِٱلْحُسْنَىٰ ﴿٦﴾ فَسَنُيَسِّرُهُۥ لِلْيُسْرَىٰ ﴿٧﴾ وَأَمَّا مَنۢ بَخِلَ وَٱسْتَغْنَىٰ ﴿٨﴾ وَكَذَّبَ بِٱلْحُسْنَىٰ ﴿٩﴾ فَسَنُيَسِّرُهُۥ لِلْعُسْرَىٰ ﴿١٠﴾
Translation: “As for he who gives and fears Allaah, and believes in the best [reward], We will ease him toward ease. But as for he who withholds and considers himself free of need, and denies the best [reward], We will ease him toward difficulty.” (Surah Al Layl, 92:5-10)
The most righteous of people are the ones who are most perfect in servitude to الله سبحانه وتعالى, most aware of their utter need of their Lord, and that they cannot do without their Lord even for the blink of an eye.
4. The Command to Rely on Allaah
وَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى اللَّهِ ۚ وَكَفَىٰ بِاللَّهِ وَكِيلًا
Translation: “And rely upon Allaah; and sufficient is Allaah as Disposer of affairs.” (Surah Al Ahzab, 33:3)
Tafsir Explanation (Tabari):
Imam Tabari explains that this verse commands the believer to place their trust in Allaah after they have done what is required of them. Allaah alone is sufficient as a guardian and protector. No human being, no matter how capable, can guarantee success. Only Allaah can.
(Reference: Tafsir At-Tabari, Surah Al Ahzab, verse 3)
The Hadith Evidence
1. The Du’a of Not Being Left to Ourselves
Anas ibn Malik reported that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم said to Fatimah:
“What would prevent you from listening to the advice I give you? You should say when morning comes and when evening comes:
يَا حَيُّ، يَا قَيُّومُ، بِرَحْمَتِكَ أَسْتَغِيثُ، أَصْلِحْ لِي شَأْنِي كُلَّهُ، وَلَا تَكِلْنِي إِلَى نَفْسِي طَرْفَةَ عَيْنٍ
Translation: O Ever Living, O Self-Sustaining and Supporter of all, by Your mercy I seek help. Rectify for me all of my affairs and do not leave me to myself, even for the blink of an eye.”
Source:
- An Nasa’i in Sunan Al Kubra (6/147) and in ‘Amal Al Yawm wa Al Laylah (Hadith 46)
- Al Hakim in Al Mustadrak (1/730)
- Al Bayhaqi in Al Asma’ wa As Sifat (112)
Grading: Hasan (Good) according to Al Albani in Sahih Al-Jami’ (5042)
Analysis:
The phrase “do not leave me in charge of my affairs even for the blink of an eye” reflects a believer’s realization that humans are inherently weak and cannot sustain themselves without the aid of الله سبحانه وتعالى.
الله سبحانه وتعالى created humans with inherent limitations. How, then, can we depend on ourselves when we are naturally weak and dependent? Instead, reliance on الله سبحانه وتعالى, the Strong and the Sustainer, is the only path to true confidence and success.
2. The Prophet’s Du’a About His Heart
Anas ibn Malik reported that the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم used to frequently say:
يَا مُقَلِّبَ الْقُلُوبِ ثَبِّتْ قَلْبِي عَلَى دِينِكَ
Translation: “O Controller of the hearts, make my heart steadfast upon Your religion.”
Source: Sunan At Tirmidhi, Book 44, Hadith 24 (Hadith 2140)
Grading: Sahih (Authentic) according to Tirmidhi and Al Albani
Explanation:
Umm Salamah asked the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم why he made this du’a so frequently. He replied, “O Umm Salamah, verily the hearts of the sons of Adam are all between two fingers of the Most Merciful as one heart. He directs them wherever He wills.”
This shows that even the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم, the best of creation, did not rely on his own strength or confidence. He constantly asked Allaah to keep his heart steadfast.
3. The Prophet’s Need for Allaah’s Support
وَلَوْلَآ أَن ثَبَّتْنَـٰكَ لَقَدْ كِدتَّ تَرْكَنُ إِلَيْهِمْ شَيْـًۭٔا قَلِيلًا
Translation: “And had We not made you stand firm, you would nearly have inclined to them a little.” (Surah Al Isra, 17:74)
The Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم knew that his heart was in the Hand of the Most Gracious, may He be glorified and exalted, and that he had no control over it at all, and he knew that الله سبحانه وتعالى, may He be glorified, directs it as He wills.
Scholarly Statements
Ibn Al Qayyim on Need for Allaah
Ibn Al Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
“The one who is guided attains guidance because he recognizes his utter need for his Lord. But the one who fails is deceived by a sense of self sufficiency, leading to arrogance and transgression.”
Source: Tariq Al Hijratayn (The Path of the Two Migrations), pages 25-26
Full quote context:
Ibn Al Qayyim explains in this section that the degree to which a person recognizes their need for Allaah is the degree to which they are truly guided. Those who fall into misguidance do so because they believe they are self sufficient and don’t need Allaah’s help in every moment.
He connects this to the verse in Surah Al Alaq (96:6-7) about human transgression stemming from feeling self sufficient.
Thus the extent of a person’s awareness of his need for his Lord is commensurate with his knowledge of his Lord, how close he is to Him, and his status before Him.
(Reference: Ibn Al Qayyim, Tariq Al Hijratayn, Dar Ibn Kathir edition, pp. 25-26)
The Danger of Self Confidence in Islam
For Muslims, acknowledging الله سبحانه وتعالى as the Lord of all creation, and that He is the Creator and Sustainer, is fundamental.
When you witness people achieving great heights, it is ultimately الله سبحانه وتعالى providing for them, not their self reliance. Sincere believers recognize that every success, whether theirs or others, is a direct blessing from الله سبحانه وتعالى.
Those who attribute success solely to their own efforts fall into one of 3 categories:
- Ignorant – unaware of who الله سبحانه وتعالى is
- Rigid – unwilling to accept this reality
- Non-believers – denying the sovereignty of الله سبحانه وتعالى altogether
True confidence is freeing yourself from self reliance and instead placing complete trust in الله سبحانه وتعالى. It is acknowledging that you are not self sufficient, but الله سبحانه وتعالى is.
Part 7: The Alternative – True Confidence in Allaah
Breaking Free from Self Confidence
الله سبحانه وتعالى says in Surah Qaf, ayah 16:
وَلَقَدْ خَلَقْنَا الْإِنسَانَ وَنَعْلَمُ مَا تُوَسْوِسُ بِهِ نَفْسُهُ ۖ وَنَحْنُ أَقْرَبُ إِلَيْهِ مِنْ حَبْلِ الْوَرِيدِ
Translation: “And indeed, We have created man, and We know what his own self whispers to him. And We are nearer to him than his jugular vein (by Our Knowledge).” (Surah Qaf, 50:16)
How incredible is this? Your Lord, from His endless Mercy, made you Muslim and gave you the knowledge that His decree governs everything. Even your reading of these words is by His decree. This is His way of guiding you toward true confidence!
True confidence lies in Him.
Ask Him for:
- What you need
- What you want
- What you dream of
He is able to do all things. الله أكبر.
No need to dwell on doubts. No need to hold yourself back. The One who controls everything is waiting for you to turn to Him.
Did you know that الله سبحانه وتعالى gets angry when we don’t ask Him?
Get up. Ask الله سبحانه وتعالى. Pour your heart out to Him.
الله says: “O My servants, were the first of you and the last of you, the humans and the jinns of you to rise in one place and make a request of me, and were I to give everyone what he requested, that would not decrease what I have, any more than a needle decreases the sea if put in it.”
Source: Hadith Qudsi, Sahih Muslim
سبحان الله!
Your confidence isn’t in your abilities; it’s in the One who blessed you with them. Trust Him, turn to Him, and watch your life transform.
Part 8: Complete and True Confidence in Allaah
When we look at the women praised by الله سبحانه وتعالى, we find that their remarkable stature was rooted in their connection and reliance upon Him.
These women, may الله سبحانه وتعالى have mercy on them, were unshakable in their trust in الله سبحانه وتعالى.
They achieved feats that seem unimaginable to us today, solely because they were honoured and blessed with the sweetness of imaan (faith).
This, my dear sisters, is true confidence a confidence that does not rely on fleeting, external, and temporary matters.
Consider:
The story of Maryam (عليها السلام), who was provided with sustenance directly by الله سبحانه وتعالى.
The story of Asiya, who chose the torment of this world over the luxury and power she had access to.
And think of Khadijah رضي الله عنها, whose confidence in الله سبحانه وتعالى was evident when she consoled the Prophet صلى الله عليه وسلم after he came to her frightened by his first encounter with Jibreel (عليه السلام).
We live in times where the personal development industry often promotes practices and ideas that seem harmless.
However, these practices often fail to acknowledge the magnificence of our Lord and Sustainer, الله سبحانه وتعالى, or remind us of His qadr (decree and power).
This lack of recognition leaves many impressionable people vulnerable, seeking confidence in ways that overlook the blessings of Islaam.
Islaam is a blessing, and tawheed (the oneness of الله سبحانه وتعالى) ties us to the security and completeness of our religion.
The Permissible Understanding of Confidence
Shaykh Uthaymeen رحمه الله was once asked about attributing confidence to oneself. He responded that there is no problem in saying you are confident, but he emphasized this key point:
“The person may be certain of himself by the help of الله سبحانه وتعالى, based on what الله has given him of knowledge, ability, and so on.”
This clearly shows that self confidence, when grounded in reliance upon الله سبحانه وتعالى, is permissible. The connection between self confidence and trust in الله سبحانه وتعالى is undeniable and essential.
Legitimate confidence is granted by الله سبحانه وتعالى and does not require any financial investment. Attaining it is free, and you can begin today.
Reject societal trends that promote superficial confidence, and step into the realm of real confidence: the kind that comes from trusting in الله سبحانه وتعالى.
Part 9: Practical Action Steps
What Should You Do If You’ve Been Taught Self Confidence Methods?
If you’ve participated in confidence programs, invested in mindset coaching, or been taught to rely on yourself, here’s what you need to do:
Step 1: Audit What You’ve Learned
Go through any programs, courses, or coaching you’ve received and ask:
About the methods:
- Where did this technique originate?
- What philosophy or belief system is it based on?
- Does it place me at the center or Allaah at the center?
- Does it teach me to rely on myself or on Allaah?
About the language:
- Am I being taught to “believe in myself” or to “trust in Allaah”?
- Is the focus on my abilities or on what Allaah has given me?
- Are the affirmations/statements I’m saying a form of du’a to Allaah or self talk?
About the results:
- Am I being taught that my thoughts create reality?
- Am I being told that I can manifest what I want?
- Is the outcome attributed to my mindset or to the decree of Allaah?
Step 2: Identify What Needs to Be Removed
If you discover practices that are:
- Rooted in New Age spirituality
- Based on the Law of Attraction
- Teaching you to rely on yourself instead of Allaah
- Involving visualization, manifestation, or affirmations
- Using techniques from NLP, tapping, or energy work
These must be stopped immediately.
Make tawbah to Allaah for having practiced them, even if you did so unknowingly. Allaah forgives those who repent sincerely.
Step 3: Replace with Islamic Practices
Instead of affirmations, practice:
- Du’a to Allaah for what you need
- Dhikr (remembrance of Allaah)
- Reading and reflecting on Qur’an
Instead of visualization, practice:
- Planning and taking action (tying your camel)
- Making du’a for success
- Trusting Allaah with the outcome
Instead of mindset work, practice:
- Seeking knowledge of Allaah (His Names, His Attributes)
- Understanding qadr (divine decree)
- Building your relationship with Allaah through worship
Step 4: Rebuild on Tawakkul
Daily Practices to Build Tawakkul:
Morning:
- Start with du’a asking Allaah not to leave you to yourself even for a blink of an eye
- Make istighfar (seeking forgiveness)
- Recite morning adhkar (remembrance)
- Plan your day while acknowledging Allaah controls all outcomes
Throughout the Day:
- Before any task, say “Bismillah” (In the name of Allaah)
- When you complete something, say “Alhamdulillah” (All praise is for Allaah)
- When something doesn’t go as planned, say “Qadar Allahu wa ma sha’a fa’al” (Allaah has decreed and what He wills, He does)
Evening:
- Review your day and acknowledge what Allaah allowed
- Make tawbah for any moments you relied on yourself instead of Him
- Recite evening adhkar
- Ask Allaah for a good night and to wake you for Fajr
Step 5: Seek Knowledge
Learn about:
- The Names and Attributes of Allaah (especially Al Wakeel, Al Qawiyy, Ar Razzaq)
- Qadr (divine decree) and how everything is under Allaah’s control
- Tawakkul (reliance on Allaah) from authentic Islamic sources
- The lives of the Prophets and how they relied on Allaah
Recommended Resources:
- “Reliance on Allaah” by Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen
- “Diseases of the Hearts and Their Cures” by Ibn Taymiyyah
- “The Beliefs of Ahl As Sunnah” by multiple scholars
- Lectures on Tawakkul by authentic scholars
Step 6: Choose Future Investments Wisely
Before investing in any program, course, or coaching:
Ask the coach/teacher:
- What modalities do you use and where do they come from?
- Are you certified in any secular coaching methods (ICF, NLP, etc.)?
- How do you ensure your methods align with Tawheed?
- Can you provide evidence, from the deen, for the techniques you teach?
Research:
- Look up the origins of any techniques they mention
- Ask trusted people of knowledge if you’re unsure
- If something feels off, don’t ignore that feeling
Remember: It’s better to go without coaching than to learn something that harms your aqeedah.
Part 10: How to Practice Tawakkul
Tawakkul Doesn’t Mean Passivity
Tawakkul doesn’t mean passively waiting for things to happen; it means submitting to the plan of الله سبحانه وتعالى while doing your best within your capacity.
Have Trust in الله سبحانه وتعالى Always, But Also Put in the Work
Let’s say you want to bake a cake. If you sit and make du’a for a cake to appear without getting the ingredients or following the recipe, you might never see the cake (الله is able to do all things!).
Similarly, baking the cake without praying to الله سبحانه وتعالى or relying on His blessing will make your efforts hollow.
True Tawakkul means asking الله سبحانه وتعالى for success while taking action, such as:
- Buying the ingredients
- Measuring them
- Mixing and baking
- Knowing the outcome is ultimately in His سبحانه وتعالى hands
In Islam, Confidence Is Placing Confidence in الله سبحانه وتعالى
Islam doesn’t promote self confidence in the way the modern world defines it (relying solely on oneself).
Instead, it encourages YOU to place all your confidence in الله سبحانه وتعالى, trusting Him while recognizing that He has given you the tools and abilities to act.
Your role is to strive, submit, and leave the results to الله سبحانه وتعالى.
As الله سبحانه وتعالى says in the Quran:
وَتَوَكَّلْ عَلَى ٱللَّهِ ۚ وَكَفَىٰ بِٱللَّهِ وَكِيلًۭا
Translation: “And rely upon Allaah, and sufficient is Allaah as Disposer of affairs.” (Surah Al-Ahzab, 33:3)
Conclusion
They Say vs. We Say
They say: “In a society that profits from your self doubt, loving yourself is a rebellious act.”
But we say: “In a society that profits from your self doubt, having complete confidence in الله is a tremendous act!”
The Choice Before You
By relying on الله سبحانه وتعالى, you gain a confidence that is unwavering, eternal, and serves you in both this world and the hereafter.
So, instead of chasing fleeting self confidence, turn to الله سبحانه وتعالى with humility and trust.
Place your trust in الله سبحانه وتعالى, and you will find what you need that no worldly trend can provide a confidence that liberates, strengthens, and connects you to the Ever Living.
Ask الله سبحانه وتعالى:
- To make it easy for you to achieve your goals
- To reveal what you need to do to make changes that He is pleased with in your life
Turn to الله سبحانه وتعالى. He is waiting for your supplication, and He is capable of doing all things.
May الله سبحانه وتعالى make it easy for you and me, Aameen.
Sources & References
Qur’anic References
- Surah An Nisa, 4:28
- Surah Al Alaq, 96:6-7
- Surah Al Ahzab, 33:3
- Surah Al Isra, 17:74
- Surah Al Layl, 92:5-10
- Surah Qaf, 50:16
- Surah Ash Shu’ara, 26:63
- Surah Al A’raf, 7:160
Tafsir Sources
- Tafsir Ibn Kathir
- Tafsir At Tabari
- Tafsir As Sa’di
Hadith Collections Referenced
- Sahih Bukhari
- Sahih Muslim
- Sunan At Tirmidhi
- Sunan An Nasa’i (Al Kubra and ‘Amal Al Yawm wa Al Laylah)
- Al Mustadrak by Al Hakim
- Al Asma’ wa As Sifat by Al Bayhaqi
Scholarly Works
- Tariq Al Hijratayn by Ibn Al Qayyim (Dar Ibn Kathir edition, pp. 25-26)
- Sahih Al Jami’ by Al Albani (for hadith gradings)
Historical Sources on Self Confidence Movement
- “Think and Grow Rich” by Napoleon Hill (1937)
- “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie (1936)
- “The Power of Positive Thinking” by Norman Vincent Peale (1952)
- Research on the New Thought Movement and its influence on modern personal development
- Analysis of Humanistic Psychology (Carl Rogers, Abraham Maslow)
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy development (Aaron Beck, Albert Ellis)
- The Self Esteem Movement (1980s-1990s)
Modern Personal Development Figures Referenced
- Tony Robbins
- Brené Brown
- Mel Robbins
- Rachel Hollis
- Jen Sincero
Notes on Sources Needing Further Verification
Hadith of Tying the Camel:
- Source: Sunan At Tirmidhi (2517)
- Grading disputed: Hasan (Tirmidhi) vs. Da’if (Al Albani)
- Meaning supported by general Islamic principles of taking means
Shaykh Ibn Uthaymeen’s Statement:
- The article references his fatwa on confidence but does not provide the original source
- This will updated
About This Research
This article is part of the ongoing research at 7FigureMuslimah.com, which investigates problematic practices in the online business, personal development, and coaching industries and develops halal alternatives rooted in Qur’aan and Sunnah.
If you have questions, corrections, or want to suggest topics for investigation, please contact us.
All success and benefit comes from Allaah alone. Any errors are from myself and Shaytan.
May Allaah accept this work and make it a means of benefit for the ummah. Ameen.